Seas of Troubles

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I'm confused.

How can such immorality lead to so much comfort?

Shakespeare really said it well in 'to be or not to be...' This land is indeed the land of outrageous fortune, and I do indeed exist in the land of a sea of troubles.

Yet shall I lay down with the immorality that exists to sustain that fortune, or is that the inherent nature of fortune?

Mayhap I would believe the latter to be the case, as how can one amass wealth if but through the exploitation of others? In the modern world, wealth is acquired at the expense of someone else.

So what of my life? I am fortunate enough to be able to contemplate these things... Yet I still struggle, and my life is the result of my force of self in sustaining it, nothing further. Everything that's resulted from it is exampled within my life, by that I have taken arms against my sea of troubles, for how is it possible to live in comfort and wealth without exploitation?

My dignity intact, yet indeed I do still suffer. It is less of a suffering than if I were to enjoy the luxurious life. Can I bear to live in a world where I am exploited, or I am the exploiter?

I don't think I could bear to live as an exploiter, so that really only gives me one path that I will follow, but I do have the choice, and I guess that choice is where character comes in.

So my character is indeed to stand against that sea of troubles, against injustice, against harm, against cruelty, against negligence. I keep fighting it, even as I live within it.

- Jason

Ranting Madness to Retain Sanity

So, I'm here, in West Palm Beach, waiting for pickup from my ex. What a horrible situation to be in... I feel like a slave. In a lot of ways I am, the state legitimized my indeturement to my ex, so I am a slave, or at least an indentured servant.

Oh not in any traditional way, the only actual exchange in this formal arrangement is money, but still, how does one get money? Through job. Through work. Ergo, indentured servitude/slavery.

Forget what society is doing, why did she do this? It still befuddles me, was she truly so weak of a person that she only cares for easement in her life? This was the most convenient way to exploit me, to be sure. She has the resources of three people at her disposal. One by choice, one by action, and one (me) by coercion and deception.

That's a mark that will bear on her soul for all time, and that makes me feel relieved, that justice will, somehow, be served. My astute sense of social justice screams outrage in this situation. My whole being isn't justice, and I cannot taint myself in the name of justice to force a balance. It's a horrible situation, but here I am...

So, what do I do going forward? Hamlet said it best... 'To be or not to be. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or take arms against a sea of troubles.' I have indeed found my sea of troubles.

Yet is my situation indicative of problems beyond me? My problems aren't just me, but they are shared with everyone I come in contact with. Not only that, but as a part of the social mechanism, it can't, by its very nature, be just me. So, my problem is the world's problem. But more than that, everyone else s problem is mine. This I have no objection to, that is the way of social systems. That is the price of unity (-:

I accept responsibility for my brothers and sisters, for my animal and plant friends, for the rocks, the clouds, the ocean, for the moon, and the stars, and all other things in the universe.

I guess that's why this happens, my awareness of these things is what builds them to the climactic penultimate: taking arms against a sea of troubles. Troubles from all angles, within and without. My own psyche is eating me away, slowly. I just hope that I can contribute to the world in some meaningful way before it breaks down completely.

- Jason