So, I'm here, in West Palm Beach,
waiting for pickup from my ex. What a horrible situation to be in...
I feel like a slave. In a lot of ways I am, the state legitimized my
indeturement to my ex, so I am a slave, or at least an indentured
servant.
Oh not in any traditional way, the only
actual exchange in this formal arrangement is money, but still, how
does one get money? Through job. Through work. Ergo, indentured
servitude/slavery.
Forget what society is doing, why did
she do this? It still befuddles me, was she truly so weak of a person
that she only cares for easement in her life? This was the most
convenient way to exploit me, to be sure. She has the resources of
three people at her disposal. One by choice, one by action, and one
(me) by coercion and deception.
That's a mark that will bear on her
soul for all time, and that makes me feel relieved, that justice
will, somehow, be served. My astute sense of social justice screams
outrage in this situation. My whole being isn't justice, and I cannot
taint myself in the name of justice to force a balance. It's a
horrible situation, but here I am...
So, what do I do going forward? Hamlet
said it best... 'To be or not to be. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind
to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or take arms
against a sea of troubles.' I have indeed found my sea of troubles.
Yet is my situation indicative of
problems beyond me? My problems aren't just me, but they are shared
with everyone I come in contact with. Not only that, but as a part of
the social mechanism, it can't, by its very nature, be just me. So,
my problem is the world's problem. But more than that, everyone else
s problem is mine. This I have no objection to, that is the way of
social systems. That is the price of unity (-:
I accept responsibility for my brothers
and sisters, for my animal and plant friends, for the rocks, the
clouds, the ocean, for the moon, and the stars, and all other things
in the universe.
I guess that's why this happens, my
awareness of these things is what builds them to the climactic
penultimate: taking arms against a sea of troubles. Troubles from all
angles, within and without. My own psyche is eating me away, slowly.
I just hope that I can contribute to the world in some meaningful way
before it breaks down completely.
- Jason
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